The past two weeks around our house have been interesting. I’ve got to give it up to the single mothers out there, your job is not easy (not that I ever thought it was for one second). My hubby has been out of town and I’ve had to be the lead and only ringmaster to this circus of mine. I actually find that I am a lot more organized when I know I don’t have my wingman. I get outfits laid out the night before, I keep everything super tidy, and I run a very tight ship (Absolutely no video games during the week, and bed time is 8:00 sharp, not 8:10ish). As hard as I tried to keep it together, life tossed me a couple of curve balls. In the last two weeks, I have had to kill a large snake that thought he could hang out at the front door steps, rescue two lizards from the jaws of the cat after she brought them inside the house, wash the dog after he found the dead snake in the woods, deal with a scissor accident (not sure if I’d rather deal with the snake or the blood), keep up with money from a school fund raiser, try and make, but miss a 4-H meeting (groceries were a necessity that day), take a three hour road trip with all three kids and the dog by myself, and try to pretend that I’m not at all freaked out when the dog starts barking at the window, at night, into the darkness, for no apparent reason. Why does he only do this when my husband is away?
There is also no one to help me diffuse situations like when I come home with a car load of groceries that need to be put away and I have a five year old holding onto my leg screaming that he needs something to drink RIGHT NOW! And when I try to be a super chill mom and explain to him that mommy has to put the groceries away, then I’m going to get him something to eat and drink, he just screams “NOOOO!!! I want you to SIT WITH ME!!!” Wait, what? I thought you were dying of thirst? So, still being super chill mom I explain again, because maybe he didn’t hear me clearly the first time, that in a few minutes I will have him something to eat and drink and then we can sit together later. A reasonable solution, I thought, but… I was wrong. The screaming ensued. This is usually where daddy will scoop the screaming child up and discipline/distract him for a few minutes while I finish what I was trying to start before my sweet little ray of sunshine turned into the poltergeist . But there is no daddy right now so super chill mom suddenly turns into sarcastic mom and tells the five year old, “Fine, then let’s go sit down and we just won’t have anything to eat or drink tonight.” I knew that I had just launched a grenade into this fight and it wasn’t going to go over well, but sometimes my natural personality just comes out. I can’t help it. That’s when the screaming five year old screams again for something to drink. I can’t keep up at this point. Drink or sit?!? What do you want from me?!?! This is absolutely the point where I should discipline the child, but it’s the end of a very long day, I’m playing the part of a single parent, I know he is tired and missing daddy and so am I. And quite frankly, he is screaming so loud and pulling on me so much, that my nerves are shot and I just want it to stop so I can pour a very large glass of red wine. Enter in my mom to save the day! Praise the Lord! I actually don’t even remember what she said at this point that got his attention, I was just grateful that it worked. Exit the poltergeist and enter back in my little ray of sunshine. Seriously, it’s like a hurricane you did not see coming and were not prepared for.
These are the times in my life where I remember my childhood fantasy of wanting to be Samantha from Bewitched. I thought Elizabeth Montgomery was so pretty and the coolest mom. (I also had an obsession with Charmed later in life.) Did anyone else want to be a witch when they were little or am I just weird? It’s totally ok if you think I am, I’m use to it. I would wiggle my nose and wish for things to happen. I would stare at things, squinting and concentrating so hard, wanting to move it with my thoughts. I recently caught my oldest child staring at something with his face all squinted up and I immediately knew what he was doing. I wished him luck, but told him it never worked for me. He just laughed. (We just get each other, like that, sometimes.) I was only going to use my witch powers for good, obviously, but it just wasn’t to be. Those powers sure would come in handy these days, though. You know, like when you have a child on your leg screaming for you to sit and hold him but also for you to magically get him something to drink, all while putting the groceries away.
Bottom line, I sure am thankful for a partner in life that is here to handle the emotional roller coaster of parenting with me. Honey, I couldn’t do it without you…unless, my witch powers finally come in. Happy October! ; )